Lost Sucks

The “cool” thing to say is that Lost was great.  When the Sopranos ended people said how great that show was too.  In both cases, good shows turned into steaming piles of dog shit rather quickly.  So let me take a moment to explain why Lost sucked.

Most of you are too lazy to re-watch season 1 of Lost, but if you do ever get around to it, then you’ll realize that the mood of the show was dark and the island was the main character.  The people on the island had a purpose and each flashback meant something.  In season 1 “the others” were hunting them down and stole Walt.  Ethan stole Claire,tried to kill Charlie, and beat the shit out of Jack.

After all of this, Juliet says in the following seasons that they were just trying to help Claire so she has a successful pregnancy. Ah, so that explains why Charlie was hung by his neck.  Gotcha.  Makes perfect sense.

The problem with Lost is that the writers had no idea what to do with it, so they made up random plots and characters and love stories to fill seasons that really amounted to nothing.

Lost Season 1 was NOTHING like Lost seasons 2+.  It was a different show completely.

The majority of characters on Lost went in completely irrational and illogical directions.  Not one single character at the end of Lost was in any way similar to who he was in season 1.

Instead of answering original questions, like explaining Darma, Walt’s role, the numbers, the powers of the island, why babies couldn’t be born (probably because of the nuke?). etc etc.  None of those were answered, instead they made up random plots, created ridiculous love stories, and destroyed every single person’s character.  Then at the end, answered questions that no one wanted to know or ask to begin with!

Here are some of the more ridiculous character moments….At one point Sun became a badass and wanted Ben dead, even got a gun.  She even managed to become a majority shareholder in her father’s company without him knowing. WHAT?!?!  Even Syiad decided that Nadia was the girl for him, and other time’s Shananon was his girl.  Probably the worst love story was fat-man Hurley and Libby.  Absolutely hysterical writing that had nothing to do with anything.

Yet somehow you all forgive them!?!?!  You overlook all this bullshit and say the show was good.  I could go on and on why each character was ruined but I’ll leave you with this.  Bill Simmons said it was the best drama ever written and he loved all 6 seasons.

It goes to show you what it’s like to be a fan of something and completely ignore all logic to the contrary.  I hate everyone and hate myself even more for watching this bullshit to the end.

Please, watch season 1 again.  You’ll come to your senses.


How to Create Page Load Animations Using jQuery

We have all gone to and noticed that they have a neat little animation to reveal more of their page.  So let me show you how to create similar effects using jQuery and jQuery UI.

We will be using the .animate effect for jQuery UI, along with FadeIn and AddClass.  I’m not going to go into detail about these because the code speaks for itself.  I have created 5 demos to showcase animations that are possible on initial page load.  Each demo page gets less and less animation until it’s just a fadein effect.

Check out the demo animations here.

I certainly do not recommend that you apply these animations for most websites.  However, there are plenty of instances where these animations could enhance your sites.  These may be cool for portfolio websites, temporary splash pages before your site launches, or anything else that you may want the user to really notice.

You can take it a step further and only have the animations show for new visitors.  Once a user has visited, create a cookie for them so they do not see the animation.

I should also mention that these pages DO NOT render correctly with IE7+ users.  This is an unfortunate side-effect when using the .animation class on your entire wrapper div.  It has been tested and renders correctly with Chrome, Opera, and Firefox.