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rant

5 Reasons Why Mashable is a Bad Influence for the Web

Very recently Mashable created a post on their site indicating 5 more reasons why “Internet Explorer 6 Must Die“.  (Yeah, no shit!)  I was so inspired by their post that I decided to create 5 reasons Mashable is bad for the Web.  Mashable has so many bad habits incorporated into it’s site that I fear the rest of the web industry will think it’s okay to follow their footsteps.

It’s unfortunate that no industry leaders have stepped up to say how much their site blows the big ones. (Or perhaps I’ve missed them?) I implore everyone to post any site that rips on Mashable in the comments section below.

Now, onto my top 5 reasons . . .

1. It takes Over 30 Seconds to Load

For those of you unfortunate enough to have been linked to a Mashable story (my apologies), you’ll notice that it takes a LONG time to load.  Precisely 38.98 seconds according to Google Chrome’s developer tools.

Speed Kills. As in kill me now.

Keep in mind that I am using the fastest browser possible at rendering javascript and web pages in general.  Also keep in mind that my internet connection is Optimum Online Ultra, which is 101mbps and my CPU is a quad core.  If my computer has trouble rendering this website, then I fear for our little ones.

2. Mashable Loves Advertisements

In case you haven’t noticed, Mashable has 15 advertisements on their homepage.  I have never come across a website with more advertisements than this, and I hardly even leave my house folks.  I’ve tried!…(To find a similar banner ridden site.)  Basically what Mashable is telling people is that it’s perfectly fine to have this many advertisements and completely kill the end user’s experience.

According to their traffic numbers and apparent influence on the modern web, you don’t give a shit.

3.  They Report Funny Videos Too, LOLZ

If you thought all Mashable did was work hard to uncover stories about Google’s security breach in Gmail and the drama in China, then you are sadly mistaken.  Lucky for us all that they are able to uncover recent gems such as “Ninjas Perform Most Deadly Nexus One Unboxing Of All Time” or “Hilarious FarmVille Parody Ad Tells It Like It Is [VIDEO]” and, of course, “Nosy Boyfriend or Girlfriend? There’s an App for That“.

This is the hard hitting journalism we expect from a website that reports the latest trends and news from social networking and social media sites.

4. Digg, Tweet, And Facebook THAT ONE!

Just when you thought the advertisements on Mashable were the worst thing about, they totally redeem themselves by including a Tweet button, Digg button, and Facebook button.  Not those small crappy ones either, Ohhh no.  We are talking those oversized ones that take up way too much room than they should.  But just in case that didn’t get in your way, as a backup plan they have a “share” button and an “email” button just underneath.  And, JUST TO BE ON THE SAFE side, they included a “Become a fan of Mashable on facebook” widget and a “Google Connect widget” on the right column of their site.

Mashable, Just Trying to Spread their plague.

That’s Mashable for ya, going the extra mile every time.  All for us.

5.  Google is Happy, Internet Explorer is Sad

You may find yourself reading an article and all of a sudden you encounter some ridiculous smiley face.  It’s like when I mention things like Apple or Google these faces randomly appear so you know what your supposed to think about them.  What the fuck.  How did the faces start popping up here?!?!  Vista , iPhone , Mashable .

Though I have to admit, it totally works when I mentioned their site.

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And please people, for the love of all that is holy.  If you absolutely HAVE to go to their site, use their mobile version instead.